Published: May 11, 2006 11:26 pm      

Law unjust to dads, organizer says

Protesters march for equal rights in child-custody cases

Fathers, sons, mothers and daughters marched down 11th Street on Thursday morning to protest what they believe to be unfair laws against fathers in custody disputes.

Mark Bitara, who organized the rally, has been fighting for equal custody since his 2001 divorce. Bitara moved to Huntsville to be closer to his two sons, but only has visitation rights on the first, third and fifth weekends of the month.

Bitara said his case is not unique, with the mother granted primary custody in 85 percent of the child-custody cases.

“What we are fighting for is legislation saying that if you cannot prove a parent unfit, and this parent is wanting to have custody of the child, then that parent shouldn’t have to be made into a visitor,” Bitara said. “Even our own government’s statistics show that the safest individual for the child to live with is the father. Most of the abuse and neglect cases have been committed by the mother or the live-in boyfriend.”

Bitara and the others demonstrating Thursday were clear that they are in no way trying to take the children away from their mothers. All they want is equal custody, allowing them to spend more time with their children.

“I was divorced in 2005, and I have a small boy who is 4 years old, and I got the standard Texas deal of first, third and fifth Friday and every Thursday,” said Doug Conley, who has a 4-year-old son. “I just want more time with my kid.”

All Conley wants is the chance to be an influence in his son’s life, instead of being the guy he hangs out with every other weekend.

“In divorce in Texas, there’s always a winner and a loser and that’s what we’re trying to get rid of,” he said. “We’re trying to have a presumption of equality, so that people don’t have to fight it out in court and spend all their money.”

Conley said he spent close to $250,000 fighting for the custody of his son.

Bitara echoed Conley’s opinion, saying that he is always happy to see his children on the days he has custody, but he is just not given enough time.

“They say, ‘We’re not completely removing the child. You still get to see your child,’” Bitara said. “Well, yes, we can see the child, but how can you be an effective parent six days or less a month?”

Jim O’Connor came from Dallas to demonstrate with People for Equal Parenting, the group Bitara is active in. A non-custodial father of two, he believes the problem deals with modern society’s treatment of marriage.

“I deal with state planning, and I meet with seniors a lot,” O’Connor said. “Every time I meet with them, they tell me they’ve been married 40, 50, 60 years. There’s a big generational gap between my parents and me and it happened because of changes in the laws in the 70s.

“We’re so caught up in the present now, that people don’t realize that things were different before and the way things are don’t have to stay this way.”

A problem many non-custodial fathers face happens when the children’s mother moves out of state, making it near impossible for the father to see his children on a regular basis.

“One argument that people give us is, ‘How can you have equal custody when the father and mother are living in different locations?’” Bitara said. “What we are proposing is that no one parent is being prevented from moving. However, if you decide to move, that child stays with whoever decides to stay. It’s as simple as that.”